BELIEVE Review!

Well I told you all I would do this! So here I go!!

1. All Around The World ft Ludacris - WELL DAMN. A song with Luda again makes me smile. It really speaks about Justin's travels and how he is WORLDWIDE and I love that. It makes me smile that he has been blessed to have such a great talent and thanks to Scooter Braun; he's been able to share that with the world. There will never be enough words to thank Scooter. Thanks for finding Justin to be able to share him with the world.

2. Boyfriend  - The first song we got to hear off of Believe. It convert the haters and made them start to believe in Justin and his talent. I remember the countdowns to this song. Justin counting down on Twitter with us. He was so excited for us to hear his new sound, he new music. And we were excited to hear it. Its all over the radio and on the iTunes charts. Thats what I call the King Of Pop; and that's exactly what Justin is, <3

3. As Long As You Love Me - When I saw that Big Sean had a verse on this song, I wasn't sure how I felt yet. Haha. But when I heard it! I was blown away. I think lyrically. This song is at the top for me. This was my favorite of the songs that was released from Believe as iTunes singles before the actual album came out. It made me SO excited for the album.

4. Catching Feelings - This is probably one of my favorite songs as I'm listening to it right now. Damn. This boy has me tears right now. His voice is so real and addictive. I sweat I could listen to this all day and never get tired of it. Its such an romantic song. I've fallen istantly

5. Take You  - Can I just say I LOVE the beat on this song?! It caught me right away. Its stuck in my head right now as I listen to it! They way it started, I was HOOKED. I'll be your little lady Justin ;) The lyrics to this song are pretty much amazing. Its going to be a dance club hit for sure. I can picture the remixes for this song already. I'll be jamming to this in the club. This damn beat is so catchy. The end is pretty sweet. Can't wait to dance to this song!

6. Right Here ft Drake  - My two favorite Canadians on this track! I love DRAKE. I was so excited to hear that Justin and him were doing a track together. I was actually surprised they hadn't already. but this track is BEAST. There is actually no words to describe how I fell about this song. It's amazing, just like the whole album so far, <3

7. Fall - This song makes me BAWL. Its so sweet and romantic. I really want a video to this song. I mean damn. Any boy that can cover this song to me while playing guitar, I'll fall for instantly. I'm swooning right now. Its the best. I want Justin to catch me if I fall. I mean damn, he's showing his sweet, soft and romantic side yet again in this song. 

8. Die In Your Arms  - The Jackson 5 feel to this song caught me the moment I heard when Justin released it on iTunes a few weeks ago. It seems to be a favorite and I can see why.  You can hear the Michael Jackson influence in it. It's amazing! I know Michael would be SO proud of Justin. Paris Jackson told Justin that. I know he's looking down and smiling down on him. And after his performance tonight at the Apollo theater in Harlem; How can MJ not be smiling? Justin made everyone proud tonight during the show tonight.

9. Thought of You - There is not one bad song on this album! I mean damn. Every song is my favorite and keeps getting better. This seems to be another favorite. I can't express how amazing his voice sounds on this track. Just wow. There are no words!

10. Beauty and A Beat - I was so excited when I saw Justin was collabing with Nick Minaj! This is another club song and will make the whole club dance. We always gonna party like its 3012. Nicki's verse is amazing and makes me laugh. It's SO HER. I'm be dancing to this song all the fucking time.

11. One Love - This song stands out to me the most right now. I think just with everything I've been going through and it makes me smile and lets me know that there are people that care about me out there. It might not feel like it at times, but this song is going to remind me of it. Its Crazy what his music does to me.

12. Be Alright  - The fact that this is stripped down, and just Justin and his guitar. Just wow. It gives me chills and makes me teary. You can hear the vulnerability in his voice and you just KNOW its about Selena right away. I know I don't always support their relationship; but if she makes him happy, that's all that matters to me. I love the simplicity of this song and I can feel all of Justin's emotions in his lyrics. 

13. Believe - This song has me in all kinds of tears. The fact the Justin didn't stop recording this song on his BIRTHDAY because it was for us! <3 This is OUR SONG. This is song if for the fans. The lyrics are literally making me cry typing this. Its crazy. I can see a choir behind Justin as he perform's this song live. I hope one day I get to see it live. Justin; ,We're always going to believe in you. You've made all of us believe. We could never leave you. We'll always support you. Thank you for everything you've done for us. You're amazing. 

Now time for some extended bonus tracks!

14. Out of Town Girl - Damn this song is catch as fuck! It almost doesn't sound like Justin a little, but I LOVE IT. This song is dope. The beat, the lyrics. Another club hit. I'm running out of words to say out this album. Because there are not a lot of words to describe this album. All you gotta do is Swag ;)

15. She Don't Like The Lights - This is another favorite of mine. Another club hit. This song is so swaggie. the beat, the lyrics and everything is just AMAZING. I love the sound of the camera flashes too. I could totally hear remixes of this song. I hope we get some eventually. Another dope song by Mr. Justin Drew Bieber.

16. Maria - WELLLLLLLLLLL We all know what this song is about. And THAT RIGHT Justin wrote a song about it. Is it weird that its just a damn catchy song?! He would make this such a damn good song. "We changed her name so I didn't get sued." Lol only my boy. He's amazing. MARIAAA WHY YOU WANNA DO HIM LIKE THAT?! I totally here somg MJ influence in this song too. 

17. Love Me Like You Do - This is a baby making song. lmao is so sexy. It makes me think things about that boy. I just LOVE IT. Like he's trying to seduce me in this damn song. lol. There really isnt much to say about this song. Justin gettin Beliebers pregnant when we listen to it.

Wow, This album has me in smiles, tears and feeling all these crazy emotions! It was amazing and Its going to be on repeat all night. <3 I'm glad i got to write down my reactions to it so I can go back and look at them and smile. :) I love you Justin!! Forever my idol <3

Have I Ever Mentioned?

Have I ever mentioned that I REALLY suck at updating this shit? Well, now I have lol. but I'm sorry kids, real life takes up too much time and I honestly forget about this. just like everything else lol.

Lets see, besides the fact that I've quit college, and have no idea what to do with my life anymore, nothing is really going on. Its been a few long weeks, be tween work and family stuff. At least I have people to keep me sane.

Believe comes out next week which I am SUPER excited about. It also comes out on my bestie's birthday! Yay!! :) Because that is always fun and exciting!!! Love you Ashleyy!!

My birthday is coming up too. Yay!!! Last year as a teenager. Crazy to think about. but like the song says, "I'm gonna live, my life. No matter what we party tonight!" And I really should start doing that. I don't do enough fun stuff anymore. Well that is all about to change soon. I need to have more fun and let loose a little. All of this sad drama shit in my life is doing me no good! :(

Alright, I'm out of here to finish my ice cream, read and sleep before I do something silly ;)

Believe, Job and Life.

So its been a while since I've done an update, and I apologize for that. I kinda forget too, then I never know what to write about. Haha. Yes, I know I'm lame.

I am very excited for Justin to release BELIEVE soon. Boyfriend and Turn To You are currently my favorite songs, an my most played on iTunes. Lol. And the Boyfriend video blew me away. I mean lets face it, anything with Justin makes me smile. Hahaha :)

Since I've finished school, I've went full time at Kay's. And let me tell you, its a lot of hard work, but its the best thing ever. I love the girls I work with. Its been great and there is a bright future a head of me in this company, I couldn't be more excited to experience it. I have big goals, and I see them coming true.

Life in general has been rough, but its getting better. Quitting school was probably one of the best things I have done this year. So much stress has been lifted off of me, even if hate from my family comes from it, but that's okay. they'll get over it. I wish they would just be happy that I'm happy. It may be stupid, but if I found something I love, I'm going to go for it. They'll thank me in the long run. Even if I have fifteen thousand dollars in student loans, it will all be worth it in the end.

Tattoos.

If you know me; you know I've wanted a tattoo for the longest time. I keep changing my mind of what I want, but I think I've finally come up with something awesome with the help of my best friend.

I need something to almost bring closure to what I've been through in my life yet I want to be able to look at it and feel inspired that everything will be okay.

I also want to get something about something I love. Music. It's always been a huge part of my life. I've played it and I'm always listening to it. It keeps me going in a way. Always inspiring me.

We'll see what happens, but I want mine soon. I need to did someone to draw it up as give me a few ideas of what it could look like and where I should put it. :)

School.

So I've been thinking, that school is school, well college in general seems so pointless to me. Its not cool at all. I hate, that's why I'm not going back next year. I need to take some time off and advance in my jewelry career and see where that takes me. I want to be happy and not stressed 24/7. 

I need this. I need to be happy and not so upset anymore.  It might hurt my family; and everyone around me, but I don't care anymore. Is that sad? Probably. But oh well. 

I am currently sitting in a class right now writing this. hahaha. Think I should be paying attention. I am, I mean I am taking my notes. lol 

Fix a Heart.

I promise that all of my post wont be so sad. I've just been going through a rough time. Well more than rough but. I really don't know what I can do anymore to just get things out there. This seems to be helping a tad; and at this point; I'll take whatever I can get.

I have to admit; it gets old feeling like shit and sad everyday. I never feel like leaving my room; because of the fear I have for the real world now. The only place I really feel safe is my room. Which completely sucks. I never wanna go to school anymore. I've cut my social life. My life is nothing but school and work, pretty soon just work. I am so unhappy. Its almost makes me sick thinking about it. I just want to be done. Nothing seems to be working anymore.

I'm not suicidal nor do I harm myself; it's all just a mental game to me. Some days I think its all in my head, some days I think its serious and some I just don't think at all. Its crazy horrible and stressful. I just learn to drown myself in music and writing lately to get everything out there.  Yet, its all to myself. Make sense yet? Probably not but that's okay. I'm the only one that needs to understand.

My friend has also got me back into reading, and its helped a little too. It seems to be my only escape from the world. I think what I need to escape my reality is to move away. Even if its only for a month. I need to not be so stressed and just get a fresh start. Maybe come back one day maybe not. It just depends on where life takes me. I would love to move away soon though. I feel in my heart it is the right thing to do.

I'm done complaining for the time being. I'm goona go read somewhere until my night class. Yup, songs good to me.

Boyfriend, School and such.

Okay, I've been up since 3 this morning and doing nothing but listening to Boyfriend by my boy JB. Its pretty much the best song of his career. pure 2 minutes and 52 seconds of heaven. Haha. Okay, I'm doing fangirling now, but I doubt that. 

Back today to school from my wonderful (feel the sarcasm?) spring break! -___- I really don't want to be here. only a few more weeks though. Then I'm taking the semester off to think about what I really want to do with my life. My family might be upset but I honestly don't care anymore. I need to what makes me happy and not worry about what other people think. So bring on the job hunting... 

This is a really short post just because I really have nothing to talk about lately. Nothing exciting has happened lately.. Just dealing with the usual life things and trying to get through it. So much to worry about; that I feel stressed out all the time and I never know what to do. and I'm always in a sad mood. but I guess that's life. 

Oh; and if you need anything to read Breathe by Abbi Glines is really good. My bestie Ashley got me reading her stuff. :)

Swagggiee! 

Late Night Thoughts..

Its hard for me to even think straight lately. Nothing in this world seems to make sense to me anymore. I can't begin to tell you how many tears I've shed tonight, just trying to feel better. I know its okay to cry and just let it all out; but to be honest; I don't think it helped completely.

It's currently four in the morning right now; and I do realize I have to go to work in a few hours. It's going to pretty much be the day from hell. That I can tell you already. A fourteen hour day plus a crabby and tired Lauren does not make for a fun day. Anyway, thanks not why I wanted to write this tonight. Shall I get to the real reason?

I'm finally coming to terms with the struggles I'm facing everyday.  I think that was the first thing I needed to do. Now comes the hard part. The steps to heal and finally be the normal girl and person I've wanted to be. I tend to make others happy before I make myself happy. I can't do that anymore. I need to make myself happy. Put me before the others. I think with the help of the two people I trust the most in this world; I'll be able to finally do that.

These two people know who they are. They're my best friends. The words thank you aren't enough for them. They sit and listen to me vent and complain and basically everything under the sun and they try to help me as best they can. Its hard for me to trust. Yes; there are a few things I don't talk about still to this day with them. Not because I don't trust them, but because it kills me and tears me up to talk about it.

To me, the second strongest bird is the hawk. I know this is going to sound stupid, and really stupid, but I feel like I'm letting someone, something or even myself down not  being that "strong bird" My last name is Hawkins, and that means more than just having my families name. I want it to mean that I am strong. I know right now I'm not. I just need the time to heal my heart, my head and my soul before I feel like I can have my wings to fly. Right now; I'm just the flightless hawk.

I love you!!

Hey Lauren, I love you! Love Ashley :)